October 29, 2011 Whew! I'm sleepy today, after a late Friday night. But it's been a busy day so far. Right now we're in the middle of brewing an American Stout. I hope it turns out good! I'll post all about it next week, but here's a little peek at what we've been up to today:
beer, blogtoberfest, brew in blogtoberfest October 27, 2011 
I loved this post when I read it on Susannah Conway's blog last week. I even thought to myself, "I should make a list like that" for a brief moment, and then dismissed it. I don't think I lack authenticity or "realness" on this blog, but I think it's nice to take stock of the situation every now and again.
Anyway, I had already forgotten about it when I came up on this invitation from tinniegirl in the course of catching up on my Blogtoberfest reading. I took it as a sign (which I suppose is a dangerous precedent to set--it may obligate me to accept more invitations. Hmm... I'll worry about it later), so here is my good/not-so-good list.
Things that are Good:
1. Home/Family ie: Matt & Hamilton. Our little life in our little apartment is lovely. It has been a blessing to be able to spend almost all of every day together for the last couple years (couple months in the case of Hamilton). Life won't always be like this. One or both of us will work out of the home. Maybe we'll have a kid and life will change forever. I'm trying to really be present for the love and freedom and snuggling and laziness and thoughtfulness and joy in our cozy home.
2. I'm employed through January. That's just as it sounds. The job that was supposed to end when I moved to San Diego, and then was supposed to end last January, and then tomorrow, is being extended through the end of Q2--the end of January. Who knows if it will last beyond then, and the work is far from fulfilling, but for now I'm thankful not to have to find a new job at holiday time.
3. Learning. I am loving Blogging Your Way, and now Get Your Paint On has started. It's a bit of a battle against my October blues to put in the time and focus, but I'm excited about the topics we're exploring and the connections I'm making. I'm really excited about the painting demos in GYPO. Yay!
Things that are Crap:
1. That whole weight/fitness situation. I lost about 15 lbs a few months ago, but I've now gained it all back. I just can't bring myself to drag my body out of bed in the morning to walk or run. I love it when I'm in that habit, but once I'm out... ugh. It feels impossible. And then I feel bad about not doing it. And we all know how the shame spiral works. Sigh.
2. Career/sense of purpose. I want so badly to find That Thing. My Passion. Reading about people's epiphanes and experiences that told them what they were meant to do makes me so jealous. I like a lot of stuff, but I lack direction. And the list making and personality quizzes recommended in most classes and books serve only to scatter me more. I'm discouraged. Very discouraged.
3. The Sad. Do you ever get that? I sure do. Just when I'm feeling most envigorated or motivated (or when I'm feeling neither) I will wake up in a deep malaise. It doesn't last as long now as it used to, but it's there. A thing. A definite contributer to the two-steps-forward-one-step-back nature of my life. Exacerbated, but I don't think caused, by my lack of direction.
Overall life is good. I can't believe how blessed we are at our house: relatively healthy, employed, living in a comfy apartment, eating excellent food, drinking the best drinks, and having as much fun as work and volunteer schedules will allow. But I'd be happy to trade a little of the free fun time for a sense of direction. And a little less of the sad.
blogtoberfest in blogtoberfest October 26, 2011 Okay, don't freak out, but:
Eeeeek! True Horror!
I know, right? AAAURGH! What is that?! Yeah, it's my pantry. Or it was, as of last week. I swear to you, it was once organized. But while I had intended to acquire some type of bins or baskets to keep it that way, that just didn't happen. Surprise! The worst part was our kitchen linens. If you can keep a bunch of napkins, towels, and dustcloths neatly stacked and organized on a shelf in your pantry, even with other family members putting away the laundry much of the time, well, don't tell me about it. But if you're like me, that is so far from planet Earth it can only be glimpsed in sci-fi movies. We're talking outer space. Fiction.
Neater than usual, sadly.
I have been feeling sort of lost and discouraged lately. While I love Blogging Your Way, I can't help but feel a little insecure about how scattered my blog is--I have only the slimmest, vaguest idea of what I'd like to concentrate on ultimately. I'm hoping that writing a lot (hello, Blogtoberfest) will help me discover my strengths writing- and topic-wise, and re-discover my voice. But this week I have felt down and uncertain and just not in the blogging mood. So I took a little break. Rumor has it that growth and change are uncomfortable, so I'm going to take this unease as a good sign. *deep breath* Yes. Good. For sure. I think.
With this attempt at reinvention and self-discovery I have felt an overwhelming need to get our apartment in order. Partly so I can feel free to take pictures as the mood or opportunity strikes, and partly because (don't tell my mom I admitted this) I just feel better, freer, healthier, and more creative when our home is in order. Not that our place is a mess on the surface, but after living here for 2+ years, we've accumulated quite a bit of stuff in the nooks and crannies and closets but (NOTHING is as bad as our pantry, except maybe our spare room closet, but we'll deal with that later). It's time to do a good top-to-bottom cleaning.
So with that in mind my sweet husband pulled everything out of the pantry for me, and I tossed the old gross stuff, bought a bunch of 96 cent bins from Target to keep stuff together, traded my cookbook and linen storage (with the help of some baskets for the Expedit), and figured out how to make the pantry work.
Ta-daaaaaaaa!
Hooray! Check out all that empty space! When I re-stock some of the baking ingredients and other items that were expired I'm sure that will disappear, so I'm going to buy more 96 cent bins in preparation. But right now this is one tiny oasis in the house. It feels good. Next up: the office. The kitchen. The entry. The hall closet. The bathroom. Sigh. I'm tired just thinking about it. But I'll get it done.
But for the moment I am going to bask in this clean, organized, hidden nook in my apartment. And I'll try to finish out Blogtoberfest with a strength. Well, finish. With writing.
Bins and Books. Magic.
blogtoberfest, organization in blogtoberfest October 23, 2011 
Well, I missed a day. Saturday didn't happen, but I'm okay with it. It was a lovely day. As for the to-do list... Well, it could have been worse. Here's how it shook out:
1. Organize the 7 Levels of Hell Pantry. Identify any organizational items needed to keep it in good shape.
2. Shop for eggs, veggies, at the Mercato.
3. Book Swap! Book swap is fun! It's good for getting rid of books and getting new books to read without spending money! Fun!
4. Clean the Kitchen
5. Vacuum.
6. Clean out office/creative area in preparation for Get Your Paint On, which is starting Monday!
7. Grocery list
8. Grocery shopping
9. Paint the coffee table
10. Brew some beer
So I guess I've got quite a bit to do this week. At least I got my number one priority done. Cheers!
blogtoberfest, organization, sunday snippets in blogtoberfest 
